


Wrong Number

by castielofasgard



Series: Avengers: The Sitcom [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Comedy, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Running Gag, Sitcom, Three times people accidentally called Avengers Tower
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-07
Updated: 2016-06-07
Packaged: 2018-07-13 00:02:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7130030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castielofasgard/pseuds/castielofasgard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers are starting to regret ever getting a landline.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wrong Number

All was quiet in Avengers Tower. Most of the team were out and about. Natasha didn’t really care where. She had the place to herself, and that was what mattered. She could stretch out and read her book without any distractions or interruptions.

Things were just starting to get exciting when suddenly the tranquil silence was interrupted by a blaring ring. Natasha turned to glare at the phone, then turned back to her book, deciding she might as well ignore it. The phone kept ringing, then went to the voicemail.

“We’re not in, or more likely, we’re ignoring the phone,” Tony’s voice said. “If this is a social call, leave a message after the beep. If it’s an emergency, just scream really loud and someone will probably come running.”

Natasha rolled her eyes.

“We really need to change that recording,” she muttered.

The machine beeped, followed by the unmistakable voice of a teenage boy.

“Hey babe, it’s me. Last night was really fun. My parents are gonna be gone again tonight, so how ‘bout you come over and we can do it again?”

Natasha sighed and got up, then picked up the phone.

“Okay, kid, listen up,” she said.

“Emily?” the boy said.

“Nope.”

“….Mrs. Tracey?”

“Wrong again,” said Natasha. “You’ve got the wrong number, so either you dialed wrong or you got played.”

The boy groaned.

“Oh man, not again…”

“Better luck next time,” Natasha said.

“Speaking of next time…” the boy said suggestively.

Natasha laughed sarcastically.

“No. Nice try though.”

She hung up before the boy could say anything else, then returned to her book.

 

***

 

It was getting close to midnight and Pietro, Clint, Steve, and Sam were playing poker. Sam had just laid down yet another winning hand when the phone rang. 

“I’ve got it,” said Pietro.

“Naw, let it ring,” said Clint, but Pietro was already there.

“Hello?” he said.

“This is Diamond Escort Services, calling to confirm your appointment tonight,” said a sultry female voice.

Pietro froze for a second, then suppressed a wicked grin. He covered the receiver with one hand and turned back to the others.

“Rogers, it’s for you,” he said. 

Steve came over and took the phone from him. Pietro darted back to his seat and watched gleefully as Steve’s eyes widened and he turned beet red.

“Sorry, you’ve got the wrong number,” he said.

He hung up and slowly turned to Pietro with a withering glare. Pietro cackled and downed the rest of his beer.

 

***

 

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Clint muttered irritably, drying his hands on his jeans as he went to pick up the phone. “Hello?”

“Hey, um, I’d like to order, uh…. one large meat lover’s pizza with extra sausage, and uh… one large Hawaiian…” said the young man on the other end.

“Oh god, not again,” sighed Clint. “We’re not a pizza delivery service, kid.”

“Also some of those cheesy breadsticks,” the man continued.

“Kid, please, stop. We’re not a pizza shop, this is a private number.”

“Oh and some mozzarella sticks.”

“Jesus Christ, kid,” said Clint. “We. Are. Not. A. Pizza. Shop.”

“You’re not?”

“No. We’re the Avengers. The only thing we deliver is justice.”

“Oh. Wait. Hang on, did you say the Avengers? Holy shit, dude! Which one are you? Are you Iron Man?”

“Nope.”

Clint hung up and returned to the kitchen, grumbling.

“Fuckin’ stoners…”


End file.
